Happy Never After
by Reika Hyouden
Summary: I had always wanted a fairytale like romance. You know, where the prince saves the princess and they live happily ever after together in some unicorn-infested kingdom. If this was like one of those fairytales, he wouldn't be here glaring at me. He wouldn't be here taunting me. Yeah, if this was like one of those fairytales, he wouldn't be such an ass.


_A/N- Guess it's time to write about the famed antisocial, frigid, hot-as-hell traitor again. But really, I don't get what Sakura sees in him...well, aside from all his shmexiness and shit. _

_**Fair Warning:** the following contains coarse language and suggestive content. _

_Haven't written SasuSaku in a while, so hope you enjoy!_

* * *

Honestly, I had know idea what I was getting myself into. I guess I have my curiosity to blame, you know, because it lead me to this untouched forest outside the gates of Konoha. Scratch that, what you should really know is that I have absolutely no idea what my exact location is and I have no idea how to get back.

Well, I have that to consider, as well as the fact that Uchiha Sasuke was behind me.

Yes, the emo, egotistic bastard that left Konoha (and more importantly, me) was right behind my back. I could feel the blood pulsing in my hand as I gripped the kunai tighter, enough to turn my knuckles white. But I couldn't strike. I'd be foolish to; he would see my attack even before I could.

"Sakura..." Sasuke called, and the kunai loosened in my hands. It fell to the ground with a clatter. I could feel him smirk behind me.

Fuck.

What happened to the 'act cool so he doesn't think you're that much of a retard' plan that I thought of a few minutes ago?  
Well, I guess I can kiss that (and the shred of pride I had left) goodbye.

I had always wanted a fairytale like romance. You know, where the handsome prince saves the beautiful princess and they live happily ever after together. But ever since he left, all my hopes and dreams of that longed-for romance instantly vanished. I mean, if this was like one of those fairytales, he wouldn't be here taunting me. He wouldn't be here glaring at the back of my head like he wanted to burn a hole right through it. If this was like one of those fairytales, he wouldn't be such an ass.

His voice snapped me out of my thoughts.

"Sakura, turn around."

I could tell it was more of an order than an offer, but I didn't comply. I mean, why would I? I had already proved my idiocy in front of him, and that proved to be more of a hassle than you may think. So if I turned around, it would show him that he controlled me-which was no way in hell true.

It was freezing outside, but he surely didn't show any sign of discomfort. I, on the other hand was shivering like a skin-tight-spandex-suit-wearing Lee getting attacked with Kisame's water bullet jutsu.

I could feel him smirk...again.

Fuck...again.

And there goes my shred of dignity.

"What the hell do you want, Sasuke?" I spat, blistering up the courage to actually say it. I clenched my teeth, biting my bottom lip in the process. With my back towards him, there's no way to tell what his expression is. And I'm guessing it isn't good.

"Well, I see someone has grown more hostile over the years..."

Immediately, I spun around, and the words seemed to just flow out without my conscience's consent.

"What is that supposed to mean?" I could tell he was taken aback, seeing as his eyes widened a fraction of a centimeter. Nevertheless, I decided to continue my rampage.

"Do you have any fricking idea what you put me through all these years? Do you?" I asked bitterly. Behind my mask, I wanted a sincere answer. That is, if he had one. I waited if he did and hid a smirk when nothing escaped his mouth but a few shallow breaths. I continued.

"You left me on a motherfucking bench for crying out loud! Who knows what could have happened to me then!" I growled, recalling the raw emotion I had felt the day after that incident. "Lots of shinobi and civilians get drunk at night, you know! And if one of those barbarians took my innocence, I would blame-"

I stopped. That damn smirk again. But why?

"So, you're still a virgin?" He asked icily.

Well, that answers that question. I had just told him that I had never been touched before. Which was (sadly) true. Shit. Shit. Shit.

SHIT.

I searched what was left of my brain for an appropriate answer. A few moments later, I found one. And hell, it was good. If he wanted to play this game, I'll give him a run for his money.

"I said if they took my innocence back then," I said slyly, "I didn't say I'm still a virgin now."

He glared. Jackpot!

What's it feel like, Uchiha? You know, you really have yourself to blame. Honestly, treating me like a piece of trash for half my life made me learn a thing or two from you. I pushed on.

"Honestly, if anyone's the virgin here, it's you." I grinned inwardly at his snarl.

"Are you done?" He retorted, giving me his usual death glare.

"I'm afraid not, Sasuke dear," I teased, "I'm just getting started."

It felt good catching the Uchiha off his feet. In some weird way, it made me swell up with pride.

"Well, I mean, there's a possibility that you've given your virginity away, but it's highly unlikely." I continued, smirking my usual smirk. I could feel him tense up at my words.  
"And really, since you've been without any female companions-excluding that red haired slut who you wouldn't fuck to save the world- for the past...I don't know...four years, the only real person you could have laid is..."

His eyes widened, curiously thinking what was happening in the little mind of mine.

"...Orochimaru."

He gaped, his mouth slightly open and his eyes wider than ever. I smirked.

"So, tell me Sasuke..." I held back a laugh, "how's he in bed?"

He grabbed my shoulders, but I didn't flinch. I was too caught up in my jokes to care.  
"You think this is funny?"

I smirked, wider than I ever had before.

"Hell yeah, I do!" I laughed, pushing his hands off of me. "Seeing you break down like this! You of all people should know I'd act like this, so don't be surprised!"

I thought for a second.

If I had him here, still as a board, I could take him back to Konoha! Shannaro!

"You know Sasuke, I haven't gotten over you..." I teased, trailing my hand across his chest. " In fact, I don't think I ever will..." I guess it's time to put these seduction skills to the test. Well, Ino taught me most of them, but she told me a few men have fallen for her trap. If you asked me, I would say they just did that because they pitied her. I laughed to myself. Oh Ino-pig...love her, but you have t admit, the thought of that is pretty funny.

I gathered chakra into my palm and slummed it over his neck, aiming for his spinal cord. Knocking him out for a couple of hours should be good.  
Memories flooded my mind.

Stupid bench...

I inched closer, pulling him towards me.

And...

POOF!

"A-A shadow clone?"  
Well, I should've predicted this. And damn, I wish I should've.

Asinine little bastard...

* * *

Sasuke smirked as he watched from his proclaimed tree.

Her seduction skills needed a lot of work. Once she attempted them, he knew exactly what was going on. He got out of there as fast as his little chicken ass could carry him.  
But as he left, wondering why the frigging hell he even came to talk to her, he couldn't help but think one thing:

_Orochimaru? What the hell?_

* * *

A/N- I have to admit, that was pretty fun writing. Please Review!


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